Summer 2011: The Reading List, Part I

I'm a few words from completing Nina Here Nor There: My Journey Beyond Gender by Nick Krieger--I am amazed by the quality of the writing, the honesty and the bravery of this human being to document her journey towards becoming the person she believes herself to be.

As a memoir the work is fascinating as a result of Nick's ability to fuse his personal thoughts/feelings with cultural critique. I learned that humans are more than just male/female, gay/straight/bi. As a Caribbean-American woman, I already know we are more than just the labels we apply to ourselves or that others apply to us. However as someone who doesn't give too much thought about her sexuality--is that because I am heterosexual? I was reminded that for every label there are a set of synonyms that are more specific if not more difficult to easily explain. While the world at large needs a box to place individuals in, the very same individuals are struggling to identify themselves often without the confines of a label or are lost in their search because they do not have a word/phrase to hold on to.

I admire Nick's choice to educate herself by reading, talking with people she meets about binding, packing, top-surgery. I value Nick's turning to writing, reading, yoga and exercise as ways to rise above her mind/ego and to learn to embrace and accept what is.

I do not know if I am doing this memoir justice; but in my opinion an ideal memoir is one in which the humanity of the writer is shared through the writing in addition to moments that cause me to self-reflect, empathize, question as well as learn about a life/lifestyle that is as similar to my own as it is different.

I lost somewhere between 10-15 pounds this summer by changing what and how I eat, exercising, learning to be in tune with how my body is feeling and as a result how I feel. As I read about Nick's thoughts on her own body image I understand her desire to reshape/remake her body in a manner that feels true to her sense of self. I understood when she wrote that yoga for her was about letting go of thought so she could be one with the pose and her breathing.

I was browsing the new titles in my neighborhood library as was drawn to the title and the fact that this new book is in paperback. I am glad I decided to check it out. As there are no coincidences in life only moments we are drawn to as a result of what we put out to the universe I know I was meant to read this book. I have been wanting to write and have written this summer and this memoir was very informative on how one can use writing as a tool for exploration and learning; two powerful starting points in my opinion.

This blogpost is proof of me being able to write and to write when an idea is fresh, when I am inspired as a way to see how I am moved, what thoughts went through my mind as a result of an experience.

Thank you Nick Krieger. And as my husband noted, this book is one to own. When this copy is returned my personal copy will be on its way.

Memorable words:

"He shared this story like it was his origin tale..." Krieger, 91)

I believe we all have origin tales and an aspect of life is to piece the tale together; as the tale takes shape so do we and the desire to have a lustrous story is what keeps some of us going; those of us trying to run away from who we are create fragmented tales that choke and bind.